cast update

Had lunch with a friend today. Ordered squash soup. Managed to spill a whole spoonful on my cast, and now there is an orange stain right smack dab in the center of my cast. And there is squash caked into the fiberglass weave. This is triggering my non-existent OCD! I just tried to use a toothbrush to scrub it clean and that definitely did not work. Now I am paranoid I got my cast wet and the cotton layer under the cast isn't going to dry and my skin will get infected and eventually turn gangrenous and my hand will fall off!

UUUGHH. THIRTEEN DAYS TO GO. THIRTEEN DAYS IS FOREVER.

The friend I had lunch with told me that as a kid she broke her leg during the summer and she somehow managed to get poison ivy under her cast! I told her that sounded like pure hell, and she assured me it was pure hell.

And my coworker (who rides horses) told me she's broken 10+ bones over the course of her life. Once, she broke her left arm and her right wrist at the same time! I was very tempted to ask her how she went to the bathroom with both arms casted, but I definitely don't know her well enough for that. (I'm trying to curb the inappropriate questions at work.)

I am also trying to focus on what doesn't suck, so instead of obsessing over the squash stain, I am reminding myself that: 1. I do not currently have poison ivy under my cast, and 2. My left arm is totally fine. I am so grateful for these things, and also I would really, really like my cast off. NOW PLEASE. 

wrist update

The specialist says the wrist is broken. I am in a cast for 4 weeks. The cast is purple (my favorite color). This is a very small consolation.

A greater consolation: the cast, unlike the splint they gave me at urgent care, keeps my thumb and fingers free. So I can pinch things! It's glorious.

Also: I no longer have to shake anyone's hand, a custom I have never enjoyed. So many damp palms in the world.

In closing, my suggestion to you all is that, if you need to fall, make sure you keep your hands and arms out of the way.

pity the one-handed

I fractured my wrist yesterday. I slipped on some ice while walking my dog and landed on my right hand. As far as they can tell from the x-rays—and still I'm shocked how much the doctor at urgent care couldn't tell me—it's only a minor hairline fracture. But it still hurts like hell and my right hand is in a hard splint, which means I'm typing this one-handed. (And very, very, sloooowly.)

It's a huge bummer. So I just wanted to share with you, Dear Readers, some things that are very hard to do with one hand (especially your non-dominant hand) so you can appreciate how nice it is to have two:

• Squeezing toothpaste onto a toothbrush
• Flossing
• Putting your hair in a ponytail
• Putting on a bra that has hooks
• Tying your shoes
• Applying deodorant (one underarm is easy, the other is real hard)
• Applying eyeliner
• Cutting your fingernails
• Putting on earring that require backings
• Cooking anything more complicated than canned soup
• Twisting off the lid of a jar
• Picking up dog poop (don't miss this one, but sometimes it's required)
• Washing dishes (same as previous)

Props to Josh for waiting with me at urgent care for two hours and also assisting me with everything on this list. There's nothing like being injured to remind you to appreciate your spouse.

I am going to see an orthopedic hand and wrist specialist tomorrow, and I'm hoping they tell me it's miraculously cured. This seems to be an actual possibility, since no two doctors ever give me the same information about anything. I wish I had friends who are (medical) doctors, so they could explain to me how medicine, which is clearly an art, has somehow managed to pass itself off as a science. 

famous friends

Though I started it a decade ago, I am now finally almost finished (re)reading Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel. It is so, so good, and I have many Thoughts about it. But mostly I find myself thinking one very silly thought: how much I hope that that Hilary Mantel and Marilynne Robinson are friends.

They probably aren't, since Mantel has said she doesn't have many friends, but I can't help but wish it anyway. It's a wonderful time to be alive when there are two excellent writers obsessed with history and the reformation—and writing popular books about it! I like to imagine they have a whatsapp chat full of references to obscure early modern texts and jokes about various Cromwells.

In reality, they probably dislike each other. Don't we usually find people too similar to us to be grating? And I'm sure they aren't on whatsapp at all—they're too productive. But I will continue to hope they're friends. And that some day they invite me to have dinner with them, where I will be too awestruck to say anything.