I used to spend December on my couch, watching tv and eating cheese. That was good. I enjoyed that. Now, it's December 4th, and I feel like Thanksgiving was a year ago. How can five weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas stretch on for a year? There's just so much work to do, and it's so assface cold outside, and there are so many shiny ornaments and pretty shoes everywhere. It's so tempting to take a two hour lunch, and to just keep pressing the snooze button. How can five more minutes snuggling with my pillows really make a difference, after all?
I've got news for myself: it makes a difference. It's like that month I spent listening to Elliott Smith. I told myself it didn't matter how depressing the songs were, or that he stabbed himself in the chest with a kitchen knife. That wouldn't make me want to kill myself. I was kind of wrong. And if you're looking for a less dramatic example: it's like finishing that whole carton of ice cream. You figure it doesn't actually make you fat. It's only the one time, after all. But then you realize what you just did, and that you are gross.
Either way, I can't help myself. Yes, I finished that carton of ice cream, and yes, I listened to King's Crossing so many times Elliott Smith started to make sense. And this morning, I hit the snooze button five times. That's 30 minutes of snuggling. My pillows don't need that much love, and I needed three cups of coffee this morning before I could look at the computer screen without squinting. That doesn't mean I won't be doing it again tomorrow, though. Apparently, I have no self-control.
And, so what? As with all things, I think to myself, "What would Machiavelli say?" In this case, I think he would tell me to get over myself. Hannah Arendt, on the other hand, she would take a drag on her cigarette, give me a withering glare, and say, "while it is true that freedom can only come to those whose needs have been fulfilled, it is equally true that it will escape those who are bent upon living for their desires."
So maybe I should try to get to work on time? And reconsider buying those $300 boots? Yeah? OK. Thanks, Hannah.
8 comments:
boots! we love boots! i bought my first pair of sheepskin boots this past weekend. terribly unfashionable, but so high on the warm-utility scale that this has made everything bearable! hearts!
I got my paycheck on December 1 and spent most of it by December 3. I went shopping to buy Chrismas presents for other people, and just bought a lot of Eurotrash shirts. And sweaters to cover them.
You bought $300 boots? Which ones?
And while Alex is being all selfish, I am off to buy the last part of her care package during my lunch.
Who is the free, self-controlled person now? I win this thread.
Whoa now people, I haven't actually bought the boots. More like I considered buying the boots, and have now reconsidered that initial consideration.
As for winning the thread, MSI, you may have self-control, but I think you seriously lose points for the lateness of Alex's birthday package. Or has it now morphed into a Christmas package?
It is a package of many wonderful things. Don't hate.
So exciting to find people talking about me. Also so exciting that I'm getting a package..the three month wait has been agony.
MSI: Why don't I get a package of wonderful things? Why do you love Alex more than me? And are you coming to visit, or not?
Alex: Now I feel guilty that I haven't sent you a package. If I send you something, how much do you want to bet it will arrive before Rita's package does?
Because you are not abroad. And no, I don't think pre-Christmas is going to work out b/c Seb is leaving after next weekend, so I want to see him before that. January?
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